How To Be Supportive In Your Relationship
It can be hard to support your partner when dealing with things in your own life, but it is important to be supportive of one another in a relationship. In truth, a relationship requires give and take, but it isn’t always going to be 50/50. Sometimes it will be 60/40 or even 90/10. Being the support system for your significant other means making up for their deficit in hard times. How do you go about becoming that person in your relationship?
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Becoming A Support System In Your Relationship
It can be an adjustment for many individuals to go from being on their own to support another person. Sometimes it is something that you try and can’t quite seem to grasp. While there are options for help, including counseling, getting a grasp on what it means to be supportive in a relationship can work wonders. The following tips are just a few suggestions that might help you become that supportive person for your significant other.
Be a Listening Ear
Sometimes, all it takes for someone to feel better about their situation is to talk it out with a person they trust. As a partner, it can be hard sometimes not to give your input, but it is important to listen without judgment and comment. Despite the challenge you may face in listening without commenting, it is important to offer your partner that aspect of your relationship, especially in hard times.
A simple “I love you” during a stressful time can go a long way. Even better, using actions to show that you love someone, in addition to vocalizing, shows a lot of support. Some effective ways in showing your partner that you love them might include surprising them with a coffee at work, taking them out for a night filled with events that they enjoy, or even taking the kids for a few hours so that he or she can get some alone time. By taking the time to think of actions that would show love and care to your partner, you can be sure that the vocalization of that love will truly be felt.
Ask What You Can Do
It can be hard for a person to express what they need from their partner amid the stress and challenging times. Rather, ask your significant other what you can do to help them in the future. You might ask, “What can I do to help when you get stressed?” or “Is there something I can do for you when you’re sad?” Although these seem like simple questions, they can help immensely when that time comes. Some people prefer an alone time when they are sad, where others prefer to be in the presence of loved ones. Find out what your partner needs and wants from you ahead of time so that there is no confusion. Knowing what to do will also take some stress from you during those times.
Give them Time And Attention.
Being supportive requires being present. While you have your own life and problems, you must make time for your significant other. Time spent together should include communication, physical touch, eye contact, and little to no distractions. Have a date night out or a quiet night in regularly, have a meaningful conversation or check in daily, and remember to focus on your relationship even when things get busy.
Disagree With them, But Support Them
You do not have to agree with every decision and thought your partner has to be supportive. In fact, there is such a thing as being overly supportive. However, it is possible to disagree and still support them. This means that you should avoid countless efforts in changing their mind and agree to disagree. It is possible to disagree with your loved one and still take action to support their decision. For example, if they want to change careers, you might help them study the new material needed for the new job.
Encourage New Challenges And Dreams
Over time, people are sure to develop new wants and desires. Although many believe that you cannot teach an old dog new tricks, they often need a bit of support to achieve new goals. If your significant other expresses a desire to become a marathon runner, lose weight, or even change careers, it is up to you to support their dreams. Encourage life changes that lead them towards the goal they want to meet. While encouragement is necessary, it is important to avoid being outlandishly encouraging. Be realistic, but don’t put down his or her dreams.
Do Some Chores!
It might seem obvious, but a supportive partner does some housework. When both partners work, there is no reason for one person to carry all of the weight at home. If just one person works and one stays home, there is still little reason for one person to clean up all of the extra messes that you have made around the house. Being supportive in your relationship requires being supportive in everyday life. Unless you and your partner have communicated specific duties before, take out the trash or do the dishes to add some support to your relationship.
Express Gratitude
Being a supportive partner requires letting your significant other know when you appreciate them and their actions. It is difficult for someone to know what actions you are grateful for or which actions you notice if gratitude is not verbally expressed. It also helps if a “thank you” is accompanied by a hug or other thankful gesture. Your partner would even enjoy an occasional card expressing your thanks. Whichever manner you choose to show your appreciation will allow your partner to feel the support more literally.
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Allow Your Partner To Be Their Own Person
When it comes to being supportive, it means being present for your partner’s big moments. Personal, work and other milestones that result from your significant other’s efforts should be celebrated. Even so, there are times that a person wants to celebrate in their way – and sometimes that means stepping back from the foreground and letting them do it on their own. You must allow your significant other the space to have their achievements and successes but be available to add support when necessary.
Avoid Unwanted Advice
For many, it is a challenge to advise our partners in areas in which they are struggling. This is especially true if it is something that you have been through before. However, typically, an individual will ask for advice if it is something that they want. If there is something that you feel needs to be said, ask your partner if they would like your input. Being supportive can mean forgetting what you want and doing what your significant other needs, even if that means keeping your advice to yourself.
Work As A Cohesive Unit
Supportive partners in a relationship know how to work with their significant other as a team. Doing so creates balance and an understanding between the two parties. Just as you can support your spouse or partner, they can be a support for you. By treating one another as equals and true partners, you can both be more supportive in your relationship. Doing so will only make your relationship as a whole stronger.
Why Is Supportive Relationship Important?
When it comes to supporting your relationship, it is important to understand exactly what your partner is looking for. The level of support needed varies from person to person. Without knowing what your partner needs, it can be difficult to get through difficult times. The question that comes to mind, though, is why?
Being supportive in a relationship is important for several reasons. One of the most important is that your partner is supposed to be the person that you trust more than anyone else. Acting as the pillar of support is just one of many ways that trust can be exercised. Having a support system in place has also been proven to reduce stress levels in an individual’s life and general relationship.
A relationship that helps decrease stress has the potential to go the distance. If you struggle with offering support in your relationship, it might be a good idea to seek professional help in developing the necessary skills and tools to do so. A qualified professional will help you see how being supportive can help your relationship and take to become more supportive little by little. It is not expected that you can become completely supportive after reading a single article or seeing a counselor one time. Rather, over time, you might find that being supportive is an action that becomes more like muscle memory.